Give Up Or Choose To Take Back Control?

Earlier this week I had the opportunity to spend some time with a client of mine who is in a big space of struggle right now.  The premises where his business is based have been sold and he has less than 2 months to move

Now the fact that the premises were to be sold didn’t come out of the blue.  He knew about it a short time ago and we’d been working together to take control and get decisions made and actions taken to support a move to a new home.  In fact just last week during coaching we’d set up a moving file and started a list of all the things he’d have to do when moving time came

He’d voiced many mixed feelings about the incredible uncertainty that comes when the place you lease for work is going to sooner than later be owned by someone else who may not want you to stay.  Everything he shared were what I’d call usual responses to uncertainty.  In fact I knew many of them myself from when we sold our home last year and I had to find somewhere to work from quite quickly

The thing is, when the call came to say there was to be a new owner and that he was going to have to move it was like he was hearing it out of the blue, for the first time.  He was devastated and struggled with what to do.  He felt powerless, helpless, like all the decisions had been taken away from him and he just didn’t know what to do

Luckily I found out what head and heart space he was in and was able to drop in and visit him in person with little notice after another client I visit just 10 mins from his business wrapped up their session significantly earlier than expected

Within just 2 hours we were able to work together to turn things around and go from “I am thinking of closing the business down completely “ to genuine positivity and action.  The key thing I want to highlight here is ‘work together’!

(as a side thing I love the image above that my assistant found for the Creative Possibility Facebook page just the end of last week!  it’s perfect)

When you feel like the entire world is conspiring against you that is the sign that you need to ask for and allow yourself to receive help.  You can continue to feel helpless, hopeless, devastated, out of control, depressed even OR you can take action and do something to regain the sense of balance and reclaim your power and that includes getting the support you need from someone who can look at things you can’t see or have lost sight of and get them to help you to get back on track

So that’s what we did.  We talked about all the pros and cons of moving, We focused on the opportunities that a new premises, and one that might not match the golden list of a perfect new home, might present and then we took action to find a new home that would meet the needs of my client and his business and it’s continued growth and we did all this from a space of being really clear about why he started his business in the first place and why he’s been committed to growing it.  Even why he chose to employ a coach to support him and his business to expand and flourish

All of his feelings were valid and real but they were bringing him down and distracting him from his why.  I have talked about this a lot – the why you do what you do.  Whenever you’re feeling like giving up it’s a sure sign you are disconnected from your why.  If you’re taking action it’ll be out of a place of desperation, overwhelm, lack, powerlessness, poor self worth and diminishing deservability.  Quite likely you’ll be in a place of inaction and feel like there is nothing you can do.  I know.  I’ve been there myself, many times during my lifetime and in many situations

What I have come to understand when I feel like this and when my clients, friends and family feel like this is that they need to choose – to make a decision and then to take action.  Doing that means you are in a place of empowerment and living the principles of personal leadership

Start with one of my favourite instant empowerment processes;

  1. Think about the situation briefly
  2. Ask “how can this be easier?”
  3. Write down all the ways it can be
  4. Ask “what action will I take right now to regain my power / control?”
  5. Take action
  6. Repeat as necessary (I suggest whenever you feel yourself slipping back into feeling like you don’t have a choice and everything is out of control)

As I prepare to get back on track with publishing a regular edition of Limitlessly You!, our on-line empowerment magazine for life and business I’ll be creating some great resources for you to download as part of the next edition to support you in those times when you feel like giving up

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